If I were to jump
by FFlove190
Summary: How Cloud joins the military. Rating for slight stupidity and evil minaical laughter.


Disclaimer: I do not own anyone in this story. Squaresoft does. The idea is mine though... you can also thank my brother, cousin(count's them off with fingers), Jenny, Mom, and Dad for thoroughly annoying me while I wrote this fic. Thank them... Foreth, I, the writer of this messed up fic where Cloud should have died, command it!

_If I were to jump_, thought Cloud. _Would I survive_? He looked down upon the city of Midgar. He had just arrived, and being the mountain boy that he was, he climbed to the top of the ShinRa tower. Well, he climbed the tower from the outside, which brought him quite a lot of attention.

He had expected higher security, but no one expected a fifteen-year old boy to be climbing the tower... outside. You, know... that isn't stressed enough. Okay, ahem... he climbed the building, **_OUTSIDE_**!!! He looked over the city again. It was big, and the ShinRa tower loomed against the black polluted sky. The Mako reactors fizzed every couple of minutes, adding more pollutant into the darkness. He sat on about the tip of the tower, his left arm brought about in order to keep himself from falling into the streets of the overpopulated city. Helicopters already started to flutter in. Tearing his eyesight away from the crowded streets, Cloud looked at the helicopter that was the closest to him.

"Young man!" a voice boomed from the helicopter he was staring at. "Why are you on top of the ShinRa tower?!" Cloud shrugged towards the helicopter.

"I just wanted a better view of the city!" he cried back. There was some stuttering and the sound of an intercom shutting off. "But, I only wanted a full view of the city..." Cloud murmured to himself.

Tseng looked out the window. A few minutes ago, a blonde boy was climbing it outside. He frowned, it made no sense. The boy looked as if he had just arrived. Was it possible that the Wutai had sent in another assassin? But, Wutai was still under watch from their elite squad of SOLDIERs. So, that was impossible. His PHS rang.

"Sir," Rude's voice came in. "We've figured out why he's on the roof." He sounded normal, which meant it must of been drastic.

"Continue," Tseng responded.

"Well... uh..." Rude couldn't seem to find the words

"He said that he wanted-..." Reno's voice came through, but... there was a loud thump as a body hit the floor. The poor idiotic red head, Tseng thought as he shook his head.

"He said that he wanted a better view of the city, sir." that was pretty idiotic. Didn't he even think about the consequences?

"Did he even think of what would happen?" Tseng questioned.

"We're not sure, sir. But, the guards said that he just arrived a few hours ago, sir." That was useful. Tseng blinked a few times before hanging up his PHS.

"You know.... this isn't the military, Rude. You don't have to say 'sir' after every sentence you say." there was silence on the other end of the line.

"I know, sir." Tseng sighed. That was about as close as he was going to get to causality. He hung the PHS up. He looked up, the guy would probably get along well with Reno.

Cloud hung over the edge again. He wasn't going to fall. Both of his arms were latched about the pole that stuck up at the top of the tower. He smiled. If he fell on his head, he wouldn't sustain much damage. Leaning back, he suddenly wondered how he would get down. Sure, back in Nibelheim, he was always able to get on top of a ridge... but he fell headfirst every time. That's on account 'cause he has such a hard head.... or so his mother said(heh, I rhymed).

He looked back to the helicopter the voice had come from. There was a flash of silver. _That's odd_, Cloud thought. _Oh, well. I have enough things to think about_.

"Are you sure you can handle this, General?" Rude asked the silver-haired man. He nodded.

"Yes, I am sure and have complete faith." he sounded annoyed. Well, there was the fact that he was sparring with the second highest SOLDIER in the ShinRa military when they dragged him onto this mission. Plus, he had already asked him the same question about fifteen times. His cat-like pupils focused on the blonde. He was obviously young... very young... how young was very young in his eyes again? Any way, the general let his eyes wander to the boy's surroundings. There was no way that he could get down with out killing himself first. The helicopter moved as close as it could get.

"Are you absolutely sure you can handle this, General?" Rude asked again. He sighed. He looked to the Turk.

"If you want to do so horribly, then do it." he said coldly. Rude actually smiled. The general raised an eyebrow.

"Thank you, sir." That smile was creeping him out.

"Call me Sephiroth from now on, alright." Rude looked confused. Sephiroth sighed. "Use my name more often." Rude nodded as Sephiroth took off the harness and held it out to Rude. Reno woke up as it happened.

"What, The great General Sephiroth is chickening out?" he said lazily, slurring. The general sighed.

"Rude kept pestering me." he said as he rubbed his eyes. Reno quirked an eyebrow, after all. He was the one who did all the pestering.

Cloud squinted his eyes as the searchlight fell upon him. Why did they think he was stuck... Okay, so he was. But, that wasn't the point he was trying to make. His head jerked upward as a bald-headed man with sunglasses was lowered down to him. He quirked an eyebrow, who was that. The man landed next to Cloud.

"It's okay, kid," he said. "We're going to get you out of here." Cloud recognized the voice. He heard a faint dialing but it must have been his imagination.

Tseng picked up his PHS. There was no answer, he was about to hang up when...

"Hey, aren't you the voice from the helicopter?"

Rude blinked. The blonde had let both hands let go of the tower in order to point to the helicopter above them.

"Yes," he said. "Yes, I am, kid." the boy pouted and crossed his arms.

"My name's not kid," he said. "It's..." of course, he had taken a step forward and tripped. Rude rushed forward and grabbed his right hand as he fell. The boy had gloves on, and wouldn't you know it. The glove started to fall off.

Cloud found himself in a lose-lose situation. He let this man pull him up and he couldn't join SOLDIER, since he didn't like to be rescued. Or, he let himself fall. Yeah, lose-lose. He felt his glove fall off. There he was.

Cloud Strife of Nibelheim, falling off of the tallest building of the largest organization in the biggest city on the Planet. No. Cloud Strife of Nibelheim, falling off of the tallest building of the largest organization in the biggest city on the Planet, head first.

(_In a hospital somewhere in the ShinRa building)_

Cloud woke up to a man with a white coat, thick spectacles looking over him. Of corse, his eyes were only open slightly and the man couldn't tell. Cloud realized that this man was holding a shot and quickly regained his senses. He tried to jumped out of bed, but he more like fell off of the left. He was kissing the floor, he had only been here for what... Cloud thought momentarily before continuing... about two hours and he already made a total fool of himself. His butt was in the air.

"I see you're awake," the bald man said. He was sitting in a corner, reading a magazine. Of course, his sunglasses obscured any sort of eye to eye contact. The man's head turned over to the doctor-looking-like man. "Hojo, what was in those shots?" the man that had been named Hojo smiled... more like an evil, 'I've never smiled before, so shut up,' smile.

"Mako." he replied. The bald man jumped out of his seat.

"Hojo, are you crazy?!" Cloud had been sitting up for about five seconds and was looking even more confused... when was he not?

"Who's crazy?!" a voice came. The door burst open to reveal a guy with ruffled red hair and a ruffled suit. The bald headed man seemed to shoot the man a look. "What?"

"Isn't it obvious, Reno?" he asked.

"No," Reno replied. The bald headed man sighed, and then gestured towards Hojo. "Oh... We all knew that." The bald headed man sighed again.

"Hojo, would you kindly leave?" Hojo nodded, and took his leave. The man now looked to Cloud, who had actually followed the conversation. "So, what is you're name, kid?" Cloud pouted.

"It's Cloud. Cloud Strife." he huffed. "And will you please quit calling me kid."

"Sure, Cloud," he laughed. "I'm Rude." he extended his hand for Cloud to grab.

"Yeah, you are," Cloud said as he grabbed his hand and was pulled to his feet. Reno, meanwhile, had broken into a fit of laughter. He was able to move down to a giggle as Rude glared, or so Cloud thought, at him.

"He... thinks... oh," he sighed, holding his sides. "This is rich."

Rude glared at Reno as he laughed at Cloud's comment. He didn't really find it that funny. I mean, he wasn't rude... was he? Well, his name was Rude and that was about it. He looked over to the door as the general entered.

"Oh, Seph," Reno sighed, still trying to get his breath back. "You missed it..." this so called 'Seph,' quirked an eyebrow at this remark. Reno pointed to Rude and Cloud, he tried to talk. But, he decided to fall to the floor in a fit of laughter. 'Seph' closed the door and walked over to Cloud, giving him a slip of paper. Then, he seemingly disappeared without a word.

"Who was that?" Cloud asked, even more confused.

"The general," Rude said. Cloud looked down at the paper and read it thoroughly.

'Cloud Strife,

'It has come to my attention that you seem to be very strong. I have taken the liberty of signing you into the military. You may resign if you's like to. But, if you decide to join, it will be at least four years until you are given the chance to resign. You will also have the ability to rise into the ranks of SOLDIER. If you do decide to join, all you have to do is sign the paper stapled to this note and hand it to Rude. Everything else has been taken care of.

The general,

Sephiroth'

Cloud flipped to the next page. All it was was a line needed for his signature. He lifted an eyebrow.

"Do you have a pen," he asked Rude.

"Yes." he pulled out a pen from his coat pocket. Cloud hadn't even seen it there. Was Rude magical... no, he killed that thought quickly. He signed the paper, ripped it from the note, and handed it to Rude.

A/N:So that's how Cloud joined ShinRa. Well, it wasn't originally supposed to be that Rude floated down from the helicopter. But, I had a hard time imagining Sephiroth drift down with a harness wrapped around his sexy body... no that doesn't work. I mean, then what's the point to the leather straps if you can't see his muscles?! Ahem, any way. That's the way it happened (cough, cough in my world. Because I want Cloud to DIE. Mwhahahahahahahahahahahahahha! cough) and you obviously read it, so could you review too? All you have to do is click the button, write your name(and maybe e-mail address), and a few comments.


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